Monday, October 24, 2022

Ashy Slashy's "Watch It or Skip It" List:

Now before I begin, let me just state that this is purely my opinion & no hate to those who either hate or enjoyed the films I'll be mentioning. There are some that I thought were good & then I'll get into those that were just downright awful. Needless to say, everyone is welcome to their opinion & we don't all always have to agree.

With that being said, let's get into some movies that have people questioning why they should or should not watch.

X (2022)

X is a slasher film written, directed, produced and edited by Ti West (The House of the Devil, Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever, V/H/S, The ABC's of Death). Starring Mia Goth, Jenna Ortega, Martin Henderson, Brittany Snow, Owen Campbell, Stephen Ure, and Scott Mescudi. The film's plot follows a cast and crew who are planning to make a pornographic film on an elderly couple's rural Texas property but come across an unlikely killer.

This movie had some mixed reviews when it first came out. I, myself, actually liked the film. Now if you're not a fan of gore, I'd suggest skipping this movie. There's a scene in particular that wasn't even gore that grossed me out so bad I actually got nauseated. So simple yet so gross.. *shudders*.

I personally describe the film as Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets Smut Films. If you're offended by sex, blood, gore, I recommend that you don't watch this film. I'm not 100% sure if I'd list this film as "you need to watch at least once", but it's got character.

The Munsters (2022)

The Munsters is a 2022 American horror comedy film produced, written, and directed by Rob Zombie (House of 1000 Corpses, The Devil's Rejects, 31). It stars Sheri Moon Zombie, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Daniel Roebuck, Richard Brake, Jorge Garcia, Sylvester McCoy, Catherine Schell, and Cassandra Peterson. Based on the 1960s family sitcom of the same title, the story is a prequel to the series, serving as an "origin story" for the characters.

I'm either going to get hate or praise for what I'm about to say: I fucking hated it. Now before you get all hulk on me, I am a fan of Rob. When it comes to his movies it is a hit or miss for me. When I heard that he was going to be "remaking/rebooting" the Munsters, I was immediately hesitant, but had very small hope. Knowing that he is a huge fan of the OG's is what gave me the hope. For once I would have liked to see him cast people outside of his typical entourage. Now no hate to Sheri, but let's be honest...

The one thing I truly was disgusted by was how Herman was portrayed. This cocky-arrogant-obnoxious version of the said naive-loveable-dorky OG was just offensive. One of my childhood nicknames legit comes from Herman, so when I say I was truly disappointed doesn't scratch the surface.

If you love the original The Munsters, I don't recommend that you watch Zombie's take. Is it possible to add to "watch it at least once" kind of films? Possibly. If you're willing to waste almost 2 hours of your time, by all means.. 

Grimcutty (2022)

Grimcutty is a "creature feature" written & directed by John Ross (Bite Size Halloween, 1 Minute Horror). A scary internet meme called "Grimcutty" causes panic amongst parent's of teenagers who think their children are cutting themselves as part of an internet challenge.

You read that right. Now we all know within the depths of creepy pasta, we can come across a variety of scary creatures. Slenderman, Jack the Killer, etc. Grimcutty is just... it's not good. I had some hope going into it, but within 10 minutes I knew it was bad. The acting, the "scary" scenes, bad.

I'm a sucker for practical effects (no hate to CGI), but in this film, I don't even think CGI could salvage how bad this Grimcutty looked. I'm not sure if the film is supposed to be taken seriously or if it's a parody of creepy pasta characters.

Dashcam (2022)

Dashcam is a 2021 computer screen horror film directed by Rob Savage and written by Gemma Hurley, Savage, and Jed Shepherd. The film is produced by Jason Blum through his Blumhouse Productions banner, alongside Douglas Cox, and Savage. The film stars Annie Hardy, Amer Chadha-Patel, and Angela Enahoro. The entire film is shot from the POV of either Hardy's hand-held iPhone or the dashcam in her car. The film follows Hardy as she leaves the US amidst the COVID-19 pandemic to visit a friend in London. She livestreams her actions for viewers whose comments on the events are also displayed. After a confrontation that goes down due to her childish "anti-mask" behavior, she comes across a mysterious elderly woman who then proceeds to make her night hell.

When I saw that Blumhouse Productions was attached, I had high hopes. To say I was let down.. First off, the main character is OBNOXIOUS. She's one of those "hope dies in the first 5 minutes" of the film. Despite your political views, she's a MAGA cult member, anti-masks & thinks she's just "so cool" with her childish behavior. She makes the movie unbearable. The film itself is just...not good, but she is what makes it so much worse.

I honestly don't recommend wasting your time with this film. Such a letdown Blumhouse.

Hellraiser (2022)

Hellraiser is a 2022 American supernatural horror film directed by David Bruckner, with a screenplay by Ben Collins and Luke Piotrowski (a screen story they co-wrote with David S. Goyer). A second adaptation of the 1986 novella The Hellbound Heart by Clive Barker, which served as the basis for his 1987 film Hellraiser. Hellraiser (2022) is a reboot of the titular franchise, and the eleventh installment overall. The film stars Odessa A'zion, Jamie Clayton, Brandon Flynn, Goran Višnjić, Drew Starkey, Adam Faison, Aoife Hinds, Selina Lo and Hiam Abbass.

I'm one of the select few that has seen every single Hellraiser. I do not recommend watching past the first two films. The rest of the Hellraiser franchise (not counting the reboot back in 2018) was basically movies that never left shelves that had Pinhead tossed into the storyline to get them produced. So bad. So so bad..

As a fan of the original (and of the novella), I enjoyed this film. It has it's flaws (as does plenty), but I'm a sucker for practical effects and OH BABY did they deliver. Now in my honest opinion, what almost ruined this movie was the main character. I legit could not stand her and was sad that she was the primary focus of the film. No hate to the actress whatsoever, just the character. I get what they were trying to do with the character, but she was just not redeemable in my humble opinion.

I say watch it and develop your own opinion on the film.

Halloween Ends (2022)

Halloween Ends is a 2022 American slasher film that is the sequel to Halloween Kills (2021), the thirteenth installment in the Halloween franchise, and the final film in the trilogy of sequels that started with the 2018 film, which directly follows the 1978 film. Directed by David Gordon Green and co-written by Green, Danny McBride, Paul Brad Logan and Chris Bernier. Starring Jamie Lee Curtis (the OG Scream Queen), Andi Matichak, Rohan Campbell, Will Patton, Kyle Richards, and James Jude Courtney. The film centers around Corey Cunningham, a young man who has been outcasted by Haddonfield due to an accident on Halloween night. He ends up falling in love with Laurie Strode's granddaughter.

NOW, I can see why this movie split the crowd. It got a lot of hate and a lot of praise. I can honestly see what they were trying to do with this film, but I'm not sure why. To be honest, I think most of us were expecting an all out slash fest, gore, etc that the previous 2 films provided. I actually liked the film, if you look at it from a different perspective. What confuses me the most is I know what they were trying to do, but considering the last 15-20 minutes of the movie... I don't understand the point with the Corey character.

It's definitely not for everyone. I do say at least watch it once.

I know there's more movies I've missed in the mix, but leave a comment down below with your own list of films!

-Ashy Slashy

No comments:

Post a Comment