Sunday, October 30, 2022

Texas Frightmare 2023 Announcements!

 Here at Gore Noir, I'll try to keep you updated occasionally on Texas Frightmare Weekend.

I have not been back to TFW since 2016, so we're going to make it a *point* to show face once again for 2023!




GUEST ANNOUNCEMENTS AS OF RIGHT NOW:





















I'll keep you updated as the announcements come!
-Ashy Slashy


Monday, October 24, 2022

Ashy Slashy's "Watch It or Skip It" List:

Now before I begin, let me just state that this is purely my opinion & no hate to those who either hate or enjoyed the films I'll be mentioning. There are some that I thought were good & then I'll get into those that were just downright awful. Needless to say, everyone is welcome to their opinion & we don't all always have to agree.

With that being said, let's get into some movies that have people questioning why they should or should not watch.

X (2022)


X is a slasher film written, directed, produced and edited by Ti West (The House of the Devil, Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever, V/H/S, The ABC's of Death). Starring Mia Goth, Jenna Ortega, Martin Henderson, Brittany Snow, Owen Campbell, Stephen Ure, and Scott Mescudi. The film's plot follows a cast and crew who are planning to make a pornographic film on an elderly couple's rural Texas property but come across an unlikely killer.

This movie had some mixed reviews when it first came out. I, myself, actually liked the film. Now if you're not a fan of gore, I'd suggest skipping this movie. There's a scene in particular that wasn't even gore that grossed me out so bad I actually got nauseated. So simple yet so gross.. *shudders*.

I personally describe the film as Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets Smut Films. If you're offended by sex, blood, gore, I recommend that you don't watch this film. I'm not 100% sure if I'd list this film as "you need to watch at least once", but it's got character.


The Munsters (2022)


The Munsters is a 2022 American horror comedy film produced, written, and directed by Rob Zombie (House of 1000 Corpses, The Devil's Rejects, 31). It stars Sheri Moon Zombie, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Daniel Roebuck, Richard Brake, Jorge Garcia, Sylvester McCoy, Catherine Schell, and Cassandra Peterson. Based on the 1960s family sitcom of the same title, the story is a prequel to the series, serving as an "origin story" for the characters.

I'm either going to get hate or praise for what I'm about to say: I fucking hated it. Now before you get all hulk on me, I am a fan of Rob. When it comes to his movies it is a hit or miss for me. When I heard that he was going to be "remaking/rebooting" the Munsters, I was immediately hesitant, but had very small hope. Knowing that he is a huge fan of the OG's is what gave me the hope. For once I would have liked to see him cast people outside of his typical entourage. Now no hate to Sheri, but let's be honest...

The one thing I truly was disgusted by was how Herman was portrayed. This cocky-arrogant-obnoxious version of the said naive-loveable-dorky OG was just offensive. One of my childhood nicknames legit comes from Herman, so when I say I was truly disappointed doesn't scratch the surface.

If you love the original The Munsters, I don't recommend that you watch Zombie's take. Is it possible to add to "watch it at least once" kind of films? Possibly. If you're willing to waste almost 2 hours of your time, by all means.. 



Grimcutty (2022)


Grimcutty is a "creature feature" written & directed by John Ross (Bite Size Halloween, 1 Minute Horror). A scary internet meme called "Grimcutty" causes panic amongst parent's of teenagers who think their children are cutting themselves as part of an internet challenge.

You read that right. Now we all know within the depths of creepy pasta, we can come across a variety of scary creatures. Slenderman, Jack the Killer, etc. Grimcutty is just... it's not good. I had some hope going into it, but within 10 minutes I knew it was bad. The acting, the "scary" scenes, just...so bad.

I'm a sucker for practical effects (no hate to CGI), but in this film, I don't even think CGI could salvage how bad this Grimcutty looked. I'm not sure if the film is supposed to be taken seriously or if it's a parody of creepy pasta characters.



Dashcam (2022)


Dashcam is a 2021 computer screen horror film directed by Rob Savage and written by Gemma Hurley, Savage, and Jed Shepherd. The film is produced by Jason Blum through his Blumhouse Productions banner, alongside Douglas Cox, and Savage. The film stars Annie Hardy, Amer Chadha-Patel, and Angela Enahoro. The entire film is shot from the POV of either Hardy's hand-held iPhone or the dashcam in her car. The film follows Hardy as she leaves the US amidst the COVID-19 pandemic to visit a friend in London. She livestreams her actions for viewers whose comments on the events are also displayed. After a confrontation that goes down due to her childish "anti-mask" behavior, she comes across a mysterious elderly woman who then proceeds to make her night hell.

When I saw that Blumhouse Productions was attached, I had high hopes. To say I was let down.. First off, the main character is OBNOXIOUS. She's one of those "hope dies in the first 5 minutes" of the film. Despite your political views, she's a MAGA cult member, anti-masks & thinks she's just "so cool" with her childish behavior. She makes the movie unbearable. The film itself is just...not good, but she is what makes it so much worse.

I honestly don't recommend wasting your time with this film. Such a letdown Blumhouse.



Hellraiser (2022)


Hellraiser is a 2022 American supernatural horror film directed by David Bruckner, with a screenplay by Ben Collins and Luke Piotrowski (a screen story they co-wrote with David S. Goyer). A second adaptation of the 1986 novella The Hellbound Heart by Clive Barker, which served as the basis for his 1987 film Hellraiser. Hellraiser (2022) is a reboot of the titular franchise, and the eleventh installment overall. The film stars Odessa A'zion, Jamie Clayton, Brandon Flynn, Goran Višnjić, Drew Starkey, Adam Faison, Aoife Hinds, Selina Lo and Hiam Abbass.

I'm one of the select few that has seen every single Hellraiser. I do not recommend watching past the first two films. The rest of the Hellraiser franchise (not counting the reboot back in 2018) was basically movies that never left shelves that had Pinhead tossed into the storyline to get them produced. So bad. So so bad..

As a fan of the original (and of the novella), I enjoyed this film. It has it's flaws (as does plenty), but I'm a sucker for practical effects and OH BABY did they deliver. Now in my honest opinion, what almost ruined this movie was the main character. I legit could not stand her and was sad that she was the primary focus of the film. No hate to the actress whatsoever, just the character. I get what they were trying to do with the character, but she was just not redeemable in my humble opinion.

I say watch it and develop your own opinion on the film.



Halloween Ends (2022)


Halloween Ends is a 2022 American slasher film that is the sequel to Halloween Kills (2021), the thirteenth installment in the Halloween franchise, and the final film in the trilogy of sequels that started with the 2018 film, which directly follows the 1978 film. Directed by David Gordon Green and co-written by Green, Danny McBride, Paul Brad Logan and Chris Bernier. Starring Jamie Lee Curtis (the OG Scream Queen), Andi Matichak, Rohan Campbell, Will Patton, Kyle Richards, and James Jude Courtney. The film centers around Corey Cunningham, a young man who has been outcasted by Haddonfield due to an accident on Halloween night. He ends up falling in love with Laurie Strode's granddaughter.

NOW, I can see why this movie split the crowd. It got a lot of hate and a lot of praise. I can honestly see what they were trying to do with this film, but I'm not sure why. To be honest, I think most of us were expecting an all out slash fest, gore, etc that the previous 2 films provided. I actually liked the film, if you look at it from a different perspective. What confuses me the most is I know what they were trying to do, but considering the last 15-20 minutes of the movie... I don't understand the point with the Corey character.

It's definitely not for everyone. I do say at least watch it once.


I know there's more movies I've missed in the mix, but leave a comment down below with your own list of films!

-Ashy Slashy

Tuesday, October 18, 2022

“Famous Monsters of Filmland” Rises Again! The Original Horror and Sci-Fi Brand from 1958 is Back.

Famous Monsters has always been a rad magazine, I mean hey, I've actually been in an issue! (yeah it's just a small photo of me as a zombie but I'm proud of it!)  Super excited to see that they will be back at it and in good hands!  If you need help guys just hit me up, let's bring the world some rad horror magazines!

-

BURBANK, CA (Oct 13, 2022) - For nearly 65 years, Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine has inspired generation after generation of artists, writers and filmmakers from Stephen King to Steven Spielberg. It remains the hallmark of horror and sci-fi.

Famous Monsters is back to entertain and inspire future generations! From print to film and everything in-between, they invite you to celebrate pop-culture, monsters and more with your fellow Monster Kids!

The Mad Scientists responsible for resurrecting this Monster are non other than Corey Taylor (CMFT, Stone Sour, Slipknot) & Eben McGarr (filmmaker, creator of Mad Monster). Two life-long Monster Kids, now the caretakers and owners of the definitive monster brand.

Aside from his well-known work in music, with Slipknot, Stone Sour and his solo work, Corey Taylor has also started carving out a name for himself in the horror world, with contributions including parts in various horror features like ‘Fear Clinic’ and ‘Bad Candy’, and lending his knowledge to horror documentarie such as ‘In Search Of Darkness’ pts 1, 2 and 3. He’s also involved in production with his first feature, ‘Zombie vs Ninja’, which he also co-wrote, in development. 

Eben McGarr has over 30 years experience producing horror entertainment. In addition to being a writer and director, his company Mad Monster has pioneered innovative interactive horror experiences with some of the biggest names in the genre.


For more info, please visit famousmonsters.com and follow @famousmonsters on Instagram

Friday, September 30, 2022

Ashy Slashy's Top 3 Picks You Should Be Watching

I've had p-l-e-n-t-y of time catching up on movies, TV shows, etc etc.. I'm still playing catch-up on things, but in the meantime...

Here are some of my picks of things YOU need to be watching..


1: Dahmer - Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story


BEFORE YOU SAY A WORD; This mini-series does NOT "romantize" the Milwaukee Monster. Evan Peters' performance will make you uneasy, uncomfortable & in some cases just "gross". Which is a good thing! This man deserves all the awards for his portrayal of Dahmer.

2: Stranger Things; Season 4

So your girl was (ahem extremely) behind on some of her shows, but that's neither here or there. In my opinion, this was the best season so far for this Netflix hit. The series continues to follow DND lore & keeps hitting you with some fantastic villains. You won't hear Metallica the same ever again..

3: American Horror Stories (Spin-Off)



The last American Horror Story we got was Season 10, Double Feature. Season 11 is coming this October, so in the meantime, watch the spin-off episodes! They are nice little twists into the AHS universe and occasionally you get to see some known faces. It's quirky, weird and as always: amazing.



If you watch or have already watched, leave comments below giving your opinion!
-Ashy Slashy

Monday, September 26, 2022

Ashy Slashy's Picks for October 2022!

 I'm back! Being an adult in the real world is truly a nightmare that no horror movie will ever live up to. With that being said, here's a list of horror movies coming in October.


Terrifier 2
October 6th
After being resurrected by a sinister entity, Art the Clown returns to Miles County where he must hunt down a teenage girl and her younger brother on Halloween night. As the body count rises, the two siblings must survive the night.



Hellraiser
October 7th
Hellraiser is a reboot of the cult classic 1987 horror film of the same name. In this reboot, a young woman with a drug addiction (Odessa A'zion) finds a cursed puzzle box and accidentally unleashes the sadomasochist Cenobites upon the world. Now before you get your tighty-whities in a bunch, yes, Pinhead is played by a woman; BUT THOU SHALL NOT FORGET! Pinhead is non-binary ;).



GRIMCUTTY
October 10th
In this creature feature, a scary internet meme called "Grimcutty" stirs up panic amongst all the parents in town, convinced it's making their kids harm themselves and others. When a real-life version of Grimcutty starts attacking teen Asha Chaudry, her parents believe that she's cutting herself as part of a challenge. With her phone taken away and no one who believes her, Asha has to figure out how to get through to her parents and stop the Grimcutty once and for all.


Spirit Halloween: The Movie
October 11th
A group of middle schoolers discover a Spirit Halloween store is haunted and must survive the night.\

Halloween Ends
October 14th
Halloween Ends is the final confrontation between serial killer Michael Myers and the ultimate Scream Queen, Jamie Lee Curtis, coming back as Laurie Strode. It will mark the "supposed" conclusion to the trilogy that began with Halloween (2018) and continued with last year's Halloween Kills.



V/H/S/99
October 20th

A thirsty teenager’s home video leads to a series of horrifying revelations.



Slayers
October 21st


A group of superstar influencers are drawn to a reclusive billionaire's mansion only to find themselves trapped in the lair of an evil vampire. The only way out is to be saved by a famous online gamer and an old school vampire hunter.



Matriarch
October 21st


Afflicted with a mysterious disease after surviving an overdose, a woman returns to her childhood home to confront her personal demons but instead discovers a real one.



Prey for the Devil
October 28th


A young nun (Jacqueline Byers) is allowed to enter the Catholic Church's exorcism training program (normally doesn't allow women) after she shows particular promise. When she is thrust into her first exorcism, however, things do not go according to plan.



BRAINHUNTER: NEW BREED 1987
October 31ST

A new breed of Brain Hunter has emerged to hunt humans for their brains in NYC. A FBI agent (Maxine Richards) teams up with a retired detective (James Slant) who has come face to face and battled this creature before.



Which are you excited for?
- Ashy Slashy